My first exposure to a triad relationship was on the TV show Shameless. Alone in my room, on a shared Netflix account, I watched the entire raunchy series within a month. The creators were unapologetic in their depiction of romance, sex, and relationships, and I could not get enough.
Other avid viewers of the show will remember the featured triad relationship known as a “thrupple” and thus my curiosity set in. I was approaching my first year of college at the time and had been questioning my sexuality since the age of 16. When I first met Svetlana, the prostitute with a heavy Russian accent and an aptitude for mathematics, and couldn’t help but be a little smitten. She was beautiful and she knew it.
I had wanted a boyfriend since kindergarten, but why would I want to be with a disheveled man when I could have someone like her? It didn’t occur to me to label myself as a bisexual woman until I had completed undergrad (my own take on being a “lesbian after graduation”).
By the time it did occur to me, I was not looking for a relationship with a woman. I was still involved in a messy friends-with-benefits situation with my ex-boyfriend and I was thoroughly enjoying the sex. I had developed a keen interest in having my first sexual experience with a woman, but I wasn’t ready to set heterosexual sex on the back burner.
I enjoy being the little spoon. I like to feel big, strong arms around me while I sleep, and I even enjoyed how naïve my FWB was regarding my female anatomy. But, we were no longer together, and I knew he was searching for a girlfriend.
Not to be left behind, I took to Tinder where it seemed all of my friends were finding their significant others. I thought I might as well enable “Everyone” on tinder as opposed to just men. Eventually I found my first couple. I giggled and immediately told my roommate what I had done, thinking it was a little saucy. I swiped right. I found another couple, and I swiped right again.
I want the soft sensuality of a woman, and the protective cocoon of a man. It is hard to imagine being completely fulfilled by either gender. As a relatively jealous person, I do not feel that I could handle an open relationship. Yet, if all parties were involved in a polyamorous triad, I might just be able to find my niche.